Thursday, March 29, 2012

Don't you KNOW how that happens?

People are seriously out of their minds. I know--I am one of them, but still. A few years ago I had to go back to work. My son was almost a year old and it was hard for me to make that sacrifice. It was also hard for me to put food on the table because of our depleting financial status, so off to work I went. A girl who taught across the hall from my office found out she was pregnant at the beginning of the year. I was (obviously) very happy for her as were all of her friends and colleagues. It was funny for me because I had been where she was the year before, so I could see just how crazy I acted when pregnant. I really tried not to be TOO high maintenance, but that only goes so far with a pregnant woman!

This particular woman was quite bossy. Her students seemed to love her because she was also loud and fun (NO--I am not talking about a "friend" who is really me--there are other loud and obnoxious teachers out there!), but as her team's leader, she seemed to call all of the shots and the other members of her team were willing to let her. After she had her baby, she told our friend that she would not "let" her babysit.
Here's me:
"REALLY?! She won't LET you babysit? Because it is SUCH an honor and SUCH a coveted position?"

Here's my friend: "Well, she won't even let her mother do it yet--she just doesn't feel like her son will be ready to be with anyone but her until after the first or second year...she also wouldn't let her mom give him a bath--she is very protective of him!"

Here's me:

Here's my friend: "Teeheehee--what?! It's not a big deal! She'll LET me eventually..."

Here's me:

Here's me:

Here's me:
*SIGH* "So let me get this straight--if I act like watching my son for me is a PRIVILEGE, then I will eventually be able to get free babysitting? SIGN. ME. UP."

Here's my friend: "Do  you WANT me to watch him? Because I WILL..."

Here's me: "You are SOOOO missing my point. And what's this whole bath business? Did her mother not bathe HER successfully when she was a baby? I never had THE NERVE to tell people who had a hand in my husband's or my upbringing that they could not participate in things because I was unsure of their abilities. Any time I felt that little pang of...control loss? I reminded myself that the only person who was new at the parenting thing was ME!..." THAT was me (supposedly) not judging.

Anyway, I got pregnant with my second that fall as well, so we definitely were able to commiserate with each other. We both left at the end of the year and I never saw her again. Until I DID see her again. The following year I was working out at the Y and her son played in the gym with my two. We ran into each other on the way out and she noticed I was pregnant...AGAIN...and after asking me if I knew how it happened (YES--I KNOW--WE ALL KNOW, so you can STOP asking us!) she went on to say,

"We will NEVER have another one--WE just think it's selfish. There is no way you can have enough love and time for more than one child. PLUS, aren't you afraid that at least one of them is going to be messed up? Because I look at families and there is always ONE messed up kid--like my one sister is a TOTAL mess, so if my parents had stopped after having ME..." (As only an oldest child can say...)

Here's me:


cricket...cricket...

"Well, it was nice seeing you. I am going to go work on damaging ALL of my children now--this way it will be fair."

Now I can't help but think that maybe her parents should have stopped BEFORE having her. Just sayin'...

9 comments:

  1. You really crack me up! Well, since I'm the youngest of 4, and now have 6 of my own... I feel so much better about my current inabilities. It really has let the pressure off for the day to strive for the level of perfection, that I never attain.
    I heard it said once that having kids was like making pancakes: You always mess up the first one. Maybe that explains a little. Just kidding...(I can say that, since I'm the youngest.) I just hope I don't mess any of mine up that way. Prayin'...

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    1. Ha--LOVE the pancake analogy! I think you do the best you can with what you are given and just hope that they don't end up on Dr. Phil one day! I also like the theory that if you throw enough against the wall, SOMETHING is bound to stick. The more kids, the more likely that ONE of them will end up AT LEAST slightly normal. That's what I'M going with anyway! I only have three, so I'm pretty sure that they will ALL be damaged...

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  2. seems rather love limiting to me...but..hell..what do I know..I'm only the sixth out of seven. She's gotta be one of those parents where the child is PERFECT..and would NEVER do anything wrong. Some idiots just shouldn't reproduce.

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    1. That is EXACTLY how it was--I remember the world stopped when he sat up for the first time and she sent out announcements because her son was using a STRAW and only BRILLIANT babies use straws(that maybe was a slight exaggeration...) SOOOOO exhausting! You're right--maybe it is BETTER that she decided to stop after one!

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  3. Nika, Thank you for "allowing" me to watch/love your children, all 3 of them. That mom certainly would not let me watch her offspring. I am a little scary and they might end up liking me. OMG Who knows what
    I might do?

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    1. Okay...these "anonymous" postings are always like a game for me! Marcia? Auntie JoAnne? I'm going with Marcia...

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  4. Wow, what a rude lady! Having more than one child is not selfish...doesn't she realize that you were PROVIDING your other child with a permanent playmate?? lol

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  5. HA! I know, right?! Of course, you have the other end of the spectrum where people start asking you when you are going to have another one before you have even DELIVERED the first! So--when are YOU having another one?! (TOTALLY kidding!)

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  6. You had me in stitches with this story!! Sometimes you just have to wonder what people put in their morning coffee!!! Thanks so much for the laugh, I shared it on my facebook page. So great to find you on voiceBoks, I never tire of laughing at a good mom story!! Very happily following you!!

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