This particular woman was quite bossy. Her students seemed to love her because she was also loud and fun (NO--I am not talking about a "friend" who is really me--there are other loud and obnoxious teachers out there!), but as her team's leader, she seemed to call all of the shots and the other members of her team were willing to let her. After she had her baby, she told our friend that she would not "let" her babysit.
"REALLY?! She won't LET you babysit? Because it is SUCH an honor and SUCH a coveted position?"
Here's my friend: "Well, she won't even let her mother do it yet--she just doesn't feel like her son will be ready to be with anyone but her until after the first or second year...she also wouldn't let her mom give him a bath--she is very protective of him!"
Here's my friend: "Teeheehee--what?! It's not a big deal! She'll LET me eventually..."
*SIGH* "So let me get this straight--if I act like watching my son for me is a PRIVILEGE, then I will eventually be able to get free babysitting? SIGN. ME. UP."
Here's my friend: "Do you WANT me to watch him? Because I WILL..."
Here's me: "You are SOOOO missing my point. And what's this whole bath business? Did her mother not bathe HER successfully when she was a baby? I never had THE NERVE to tell people who had a hand in my husband's or my upbringing that they could not participate in things because I was unsure of their abilities. Any time I felt that little pang of...control loss? I reminded myself that the only person who was new at the parenting thing was ME!..." THAT was me (supposedly) not judging.
Anyway, I got pregnant with my second that fall as well, so we definitely were able to commiserate with each other. We both left at the end of the year and I never saw her again. Until I DID see her again. The following year I was working out at the Y and her son played in the gym with my two. We ran into each other on the way out and she noticed I was pregnant...AGAIN...and after asking me if I knew how it happened (YES--I KNOW--WE ALL KNOW, so you can STOP asking us!) she went on to say,
"We will NEVER have another one--WE just think it's selfish. There is no way you can have enough love and time for more than one child. PLUS, aren't you afraid that at least one of them is going to be messed up? Because I look at families and there is always ONE messed up kid--like my one sister is a TOTAL mess, so if my parents had stopped after having ME..." (As only an oldest child can say...)
"Well, it was nice seeing you. I am going to go work on damaging ALL of my children now--this way it will be fair."
Now I can't help but think that maybe her parents should have stopped BEFORE having her. Just sayin'...