Do YOU "looklikewhodiditandran"?

The other night as I was barreling through toys to get to my bathroom to get ready for bed, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and actually gasped in fear. Like I had seen some horrible monster or something, but the monster was ME. I shudder to think of it and I REALLY shudder to think that the same thing would happen right now if I were to waddle over to the mirror that is five feet away from me right now. But I don't WANT to look in that mirror. Or any OTHER mirror for that matter--unless it is a MAGIC mirror that can shave off fifty pounds, fix my split ends, apply just-enough makeup to look good and not trampy and get rid of the bags that are cemented under my eyes. Oh--and cook dinner. I mean, WHILE it's here... Seriously, though--I only caught a glimpse and thought "I look like 'Who did it and ran?'" and "I look like I was 'rode hard and put up wet," two sayings I A. NEVER thought I would hear again and 2. NEVER. EVER. Thought I would say and MEAN about myself. The first saying goes back to Snooki (who, now that I am trying to get people to actually LISTEN to me may find out and get offended by that name...it is SO GREAT that I am no longer a person who CARES about S*@! likr that! Oh--and if you don't know about "Snooki--my version" refer back to the "Chin Hair" post. I would rather forget it...) in college. On a daily basis SOMEONE would "looklikewhodiditandran" and it was HILARIOUS! It became part of our slang and though I still THINK it on occasion--I NEVER SAY it! One of our housemates commented about "...whodiditandran..." on facebook the DAY AFTER the nightmare in the mirror--like she KNEW I wanted to write about it. SO WEIRD. The thing is, I am ALWAYS writing a blog in my head. EVEN WHEN I WASN'T BLOGGING I "wrote blogs" in my head and I would REALLY crack myself up (still do)! The problem is, I waste most of my REALLY funny stuff on...well, the inside of my head because the SECOND I fall asleep, get out of the shower, leave the bathroom (we ALL use the bathroom Snooki, so take it easy!),escape the madness that is morning...whenever I am ABLE to type, I either A. forget what I wanted to type or 2. WORSE--remember what I wanted to type and then type it out in a MUCH less entertaining way than I did in my head. So that is definitely the case with "Who did it and ran--" You would have LOVED the first thing I "wrote!" As for "Rode hard and put up wet," this is a phrase that a friend of ours in Charlotte used to say ALL the time. Anyone who looked tired, had on a lot of makeup or maybe could lose a few punds fell into this category. The thing is--MY FRIEND who SAID it fell into this category, so I found it funny that she would call out OTHERS on it! Don't get me wrong--I'm sure I could use it to describe some people now and I CLEARLY am the poster child for BOTH phrases, but KNOWING you are a part of it is different. SAYING it about others and THINKING you are above it--THAT'S a problem. Which brings me to ANOTHER blog I "wrote" in the shower about hypocrisy. It was AMAZING...at least in my head! Maybe tomorrow I will try to put it on the screen...I need a device to link to my brain that will TYPE what I am THINKING for me. If THAT isn't the LAZIEST thing you have EVER heard, then we REALLY need to hang out more...